My step mother often forwards me the funniest emails. I was thinking that I really should post 'em here for you all to read. I don't believe in forwarding. This one had me laughing my butt off. The only thing that I'd add is that the men should also have to hold down a full time job on top of that.
Six
married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for
six weeks.
Each
kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes.
There
is no fast food.
Each
man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct
all homework, complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list
of 'pretend' bills with not enough money.
In
addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week.
Each
man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send
cards out on time.
Each
man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment
and a haircut appointment . He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient
visit per child to the Urgent Care (weekend, evening, on a holiday
or right when they're about to leave for vacation).
He
must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function.
Each
man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting f lowers
outside and keeping it presentable at all times.
The
men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores
are done.
Each
father will be required to know all of the words to every stupid song that
comes on TV and the name of each and every character on cartoons.
Each
man will have to make an Indian hut model with six toothpicks, a tortilla
and one marker; and get a 4 year old to eat a serving of peas.
Each
man must adorn himself with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet stylish s hoes,
keep their nails polished and eyebrows groomed. The men must try to get
through each day without snot, spit-up or barf on their clothing.
During
one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps,
back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain
or slow down from other duties. They must try to explain what a tampon
is for when the 6-yr old boy finds it in the purse.
They
must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at least once to
spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.
He
will need to read a book to the children each night without falling asleep,
and then feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair
each morning by 7:00 . They must leave the home with no food on their face
or clothes.
A
test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required
to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height,
weight, shoe size, clothes size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight
at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labor, each child's favorite
color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite
toy, biggest fear and what they want to be when they grow up.
They
must clean up after their sick children at 2:00 a.m. and then spend the remainder
of the day tending to that child and waiting on them hand and foot until
they are better.
They
must have a loving, age appropriate reply to, 'You're not the boss of me'.
The
kids vote them off the island based on performance. The last man wins only
if...he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's
notice.
